There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 26

"Jeff, do you see that walking woman towards us. You have two choices; you can kill one of us now, or watch as we try to kill one another."

"Shut up Laura, and give your mother a kiss."

"Where?"

"You can make that decision."

Laura walked over to her mother and gave her a kiss and a perfunctory hug. Patti grabbed her, and hugged her tightly.

"What's up mother, did dad lay down the law?"

"I hate it when your father uses common sense on me. It catches me off-guard, and I wind up listening to him."

"What did dad say that rattled your cage?"

"We've only been fighting since we found the answer to the stasis units. That's when your leaving me became a reality. We worked side-by-side for more than two years on that project, and we got nowhere. We never fought, or disagreed with one another. We just worked harder to find the answer. As long as we did not come up with an answer, we were fine. When we found it, tested it, and realized that we had come up with the answer, I became depressed, because I knew I was going to lose you. That is when we started fighting.

As usual, it was Anna who told me why I was acting so erratically. She told me you were acting exactly as if I would if I was in the same situation. 'Mom, what 18-year-old girl goes after the mob? What 18-year-old girl gets herself injected with a large dose of a radioactive isotope so the FBI can follow her movements? Mom, what 20-year-old girl goes to lunch with three mobsters when they put a $5 million price on her head?"

"I stopped her, because everything she was saying was not only true, but it was stupid of me to do it. However, I was 18, and I was invincible. No one could hurt me because I was smarter than they were. I wasn't. If it wasn't for my father, and Michael Free, I would have been dead. Fortunately, I made good friends, who helped me get through it all.

I also met your father, who was the biggest pain in the ass you can imagine. Regardless of what I said or did to him, I couldn't get rid of him. I'm so glad I couldn't, because he's a wonderful man."

"What are we going to do mom?"

"I will give you everything I have, including the ranch, if you stay with me."

"Oh mom, that is quite an offer. Any normal human being would jump at it. However, I will quote Anna also. 'Laura you are so much like our mother you could be twins. Once you dig your heels in, no one can change your mind.'

This has nothing to do with me digging in my heels. This has everything to do with Patricia Laura Garrett Parent Valentino being an 18-year-old girl and being invincible. I have to go. What is out there? Who is out there? I want to know, I want to know so badly I am willing to risk my life, and leave everyone I love behind to find out. Please don't be angry with me for doing this. Be happy for me, because this is my dream coming true."

"What about you and Adam?"

"He kisses like the devil himself, and I get all hot and bothered when he does it so well. We have an agreement, First Base Only. No intimate touching, because I'm not ready for it. I actually think I'm frightened of it. If his kiss does what it does to me, what will happen if I let him get a little further?"

"Oh my God, you are my daughter, my twin. Even as I went to my marriage bed as a virgin, I did not know what would happen to me after your father took that little bit of flesh away. Nothing happens Laura; you are the same person you were before you had sex with a man you love.

Your father made love to hundreds of girls while he was attending Penn. He was a master at lovemaking, and it made my first experience at making love very pleasurable. He swears, to this day, it was the most memorable evening of his life. He was not having sex with a woman; he was making love to his wife."

"Did you orgasm?

"I know I did, because the bed was so wet beneath me when we finished the first time there was no other explanation. I was too busy looking into your father's eyes, and seeing the love he had for me, I wasn't paying attention to anything else. We do things in bed now that would curl your straight hair."

"Yes mother, we know, and our hair will stay straight for a very long time."

"Your father dreamed about that 10 years of our marriage, before he even got close. Then, on the day the three of you decided to start World War III, we got into an argument in the hayloft, and he told me that our sex was getting boring. He said we were doing it the same way every night, and he wanted me to fight him to make it more interesting. I was nearly naked already, when I turned and gave him a slap that nearly floored him. I yelled at him, and told him how stupid he was for waiting so long to tell me. I said I am your wife if you want something different tell me, or do it, I'm not going to run away. I took the rest of my clothes off, lifted my knees to my chest, and told him to take his dream. I wanted to kill him, because he said no, it will hurt too much. I had to threaten before he did it. I won't say the first time was pleasant, because it wasn't. However, as I got use to it, it got to be fun."

"How can Anal sex be fun?"

"Laura, you will have to find that out for yourself. You are still afraid of a vaginal sex, how could you possibly think of the other end?"

"Why couldn't we have a talk when I was 16?"

"We did, you were the one with your fingers in your ears. Your brother, on the other hand, kept saying, "Mom, I know all the stuff. Could you hurry up, I have a date in 30 minutes, and she's really hot to trot."

"Oh is that what that meant?"

"Laura, you were so naïve back then, and I don't think you have advanced so far from those days."

"Everything I know Anna told me, or shown me."

"Your sister has to show you how to masturbate?"

Laura turned bright red as she nodded her head.

"How old were you when you had your first orgasm?"

"I was 18."

"I beat you by a year. I was 17. Well, 17 and 10 months."

"You married dad when you were 24. I still have a chance to tie you."

"Don't do anything in a hurry. Don't do anything in haste. Do you love him?"

"When did you know you loved dad?"

"The moment I set eyes on that bastard. He upset every plan I had. I had to worry not to hurt him, while taking his father's Empire down, and putting his father in jail for murder and racketeering. Most of all, I didn't want to hurt Stephano. It would have destroyed me."

"In that case mom, I love him. Just like you, he sat down beside me, and I never wanted to let him go. Do you think I would have slept in his house, or any man's house, if I didn't have deep feelings for him? My mother raised me better than that. She would've killed me if I started sleeping around. By the way, did you ever check your answering machine?"

"No, why should I?"

"There is a message on there from your daughter Laura, telling you she's coming into town. She tells you what date, and that she will be arriving very late in the evening."

"So this wasn't a surprise visit."

"No it wasn't, so you started another argument over nothing."

"I'm very good at that you know."

"I've lived with you for 24 years. I believe I know that very well."

"I'm so sorry Laura. However, look at the bright side; you may have met your husband."

"Should I take him for a sex test drive first?"

"What is your arrangement with him?"

"I told him if our relationship reaches that point, we will get married on 25th December, and the first time we will have sex will be in outer space. I would like to think we are the first people to have sex, and for me to get pregnant after our first time."

"I don't think so baby. You better check with Doctor Luck about being pregnant, or having an infant, when you go into stasis."

"Would you believe I totally forgot about that?"

"It's always the little things baby; it's always the little things."

"Here he comes mom, please don't kill him. Remember, I just said I love him."

"I think you should introduce him to me that way. It will make things a lot easier for him, and for me."

Laura ran for Adam, and gave him a kiss.

Adam immediately said, "According to our agreement, you needed my permission to do that. You didn't get it, and I didn't enjoy it."

Laura smiled. "Liar."

Adam embraced her, and gave her a huge kiss that meant everything to both of them.

Patti yelled, "Laura, how dare you."

Laura took Adam's hand and walked over to her.

"Mother, this is Adam Schiff, the man I love."

Adam's neck nearly broke as he swiveled to see Laura smiling at her mother.

He knew what was said. He was just surprised that he was introduced so affectionately to her mother.

"Congratulations Mister Schiff, what size hook did you use to catch the most elusive, eligible bachelorette in the country?"

"Thank you Mrs. Valentino, I think I hooked her, as you put it, by calling her a liar."

"That's a very interesting approach Mister Schiff, would you care to elaborate?"

"We were on the inaugural flight of The Best Luck, and as everyone was leaving, I saw Laura sitting there. I asked her if she knew anything more about this ship, and we talked a little. Then she pointed to the four people in the first row, and asked me if I knew them. I knew Mister Zabo and Mister Valentino from pictures in articles I read. Then I said I assume the two women next to them are their wives. She pointed to the color of her hair and the color of Mister Zabo's hair and asked if I notice the resemblance. I said his hair is gray and your hair is white. She said no, my father's hair has been white since he's been born. The lady sitting to his left is his second wife Jemma. The lady to his right is the daughter of his first marriage, my mother Patti, and her husband, my father Stephano."

My response was, "You're a liar. Everything else that has started between us began with that sentence. I couldn't be happier, because I feel the same way about Laura as she feels about me. I love her, and want her to be my wife."

"Aren't you two rushing it just a little? What happens if you're not approved to work on the spacecraft?"

"I was just approved moments ago. I start training tomorrow morning."

"You two will never see each other from this point on."

"Yes we will mother. We will sleep together every night."

"Honey, he's going to need his rest."

"Mom, I said sleep, not fool around. That will happen when we are in space."

"Can you live with that Mister Schiff?"

"I will not tell you it's going to be easy Mrs. Valentino, but in order to keep her, I will do anything."

"You just said the magic word Mister Schiff."

What word is that Mrs. Valentino?"

"ANYTHING. If you keep that promise, you can have my daughter's hand in marriage."

"I didn't know you had to say in it?"

"Mister Schiff, there is one thing my daughter will not give up that is her trip into space. If you are not going she will be very upset, but she will get over it. With one word from me, you will be fired, and you will go back to your regular occupation. I do have a say in it. I am one of the investors. 14 of the investors on the board are my friends, close personal friends. If it comes to a vote of our board of directors, whether to keep you, or fire you, you are gone.

You have no idea how much I love my children. I love them so much I nearly destroyed their lives. This time, I will not let Laura have her dream. Keep your promise, keep her happy, keep your word, and she is yours forever."

"I would imagine that you know everything about me by now, or if not, you will very soon. I have built my business from the ground up by word of mouth. My customers are my best advertisers. Ask them if I keep my word. Ask them if I keep my promise. Ask them if I am honorable. I will keep your daughter happy because I am all those things."

"Mister Schiff, may I call you Adam."

"Yes you may, as long as I can call you a pain in the ass."

"I prefer Patti, but pain in the ass will do."

"It's past lunch time, but not yet dinner time. What do you two want to do for food?"

"There is this wonderful restaurant downtown mom."

"Let's go."

Laura nodded her head to the chief of her security staff, and he was on his way in a hurry.

Adam noticed him leaving. He asked Laura, "How much of the delay are we going to have this time, and what excuse are you going to use?"

"Don't worry Adam; this won't hurt me a bit."

"What do you mean?"

She pushed him, and he fell into the soft sand of the eight- foot deep trap."

The alarms went off as Adam lay on the sand.

"I will get you for this."

"You are truly my daughter, Laura. One day I must do this to your father."

Jeff came over and asked, "Should we leave him down there until he cools off, or until you make your getaway in the cars?"

"Leave him there until we get past the sand traps, then you can bring him up."

"Okay, we will bring out the ladder. You should be safe by then."

The sand was so soft Adam could barely move to get to the ladder. He kept yelling, "Please move the ladder closer."

Jeff yelled back, "Are you going to do any physical harm to either of the Valentino's?"

His reply was not helpful.

"You can bet your ass on it."

The latter moved six inches further away.

"Come on guys this isn't fair. She pushed me."

Jeff replied, "Patti Valentino made a contribution to this project in the amount of $24 billion. Laura can do what she wants while she's on this property."

"24 billion, with a B?"

"That is correct, and it didn't put a dent in her checkbook."

"Sometimes I am very dense. I knew they were very rich, I knew they were extremely rich, but sometimes you can't imagine that much money being used on one project. Laura told me she had a lot of money, but a few million dollars to me is a lot of money. I never thought of anything starting with a B. Can I get out of here now?"

"Are you going to do any physical harm to either of the Valentino's?"

"No, I promise I won't touch them."

"That was the right answer."

They moved the ladder so it was right at his feet. As soon as he put weight on it, it sunk into the ground. He tried another step, and it did the same thing. After the fourth step, it finally took hold, and he was able to start climbing up. When he reached the top, he asked Jeff what kind of sand they had down there.

"It's a mixture of 30 percent beet sugar, and sugar sand. The ants love it."

"I would imagine so. What car are they in?"

"The third one from the front. Don't go anywhere yet, we have to get the sand off you. Come this way."

They walked him over to the gym equipment, where agents would do pull-ups every day. They had him stand on a stool, put straps on his wrists, had him grab the bar, locked the straps in place, and removed the stool. They put cords around his ankles, and pulled his legs apart. They tied them to the support posts to keep them wide apart.

Finally, Adam knew what they were going to do. He saw them bring out four huge hurricane fans that were used to keep the floors dust free, and put them at angles guaranteed to get all the sand off him.

Jeff said, "Do you have any last words?"

"Tell them I am going to kill them."

"Wrong answer."

Jeff undid Adams belt, unbuttoned his slacks, lowered his zipper, and let his trousers fall to his ankles. What no one realized was Adam was commando underneath. Jeff shrugged his shoulders and walked away.

Patti said to Laura, "You are going to be a very happy bride."

"Really mom, I've never seen a live one before."

Jeff told Adam to close his eyes, and signaled for the switches on the fans to be turned on. Within seconds, Adam was being blasted by hurricane force winds of 85 miles per hour. Tiny pellets of sand began denuding his legs and private parts of hair. The fans were left on for two minutes, and when they were turned off, Adam was a new man; at least from the waist down. There wasn't a hair to be found. His penis and testicles were inflamed because of the punishment they took.

Jeff had the answer for that in his hands. With rubber gloves on his hands, and a stainless steel bowl filled with water and ice, he approached Adam from the rear. Without mercy, he submerged those aching parts from stem to stern. Not only did they shrink to minuscule proportions due to the extreme cold, but they increased the lung capacity of Adam Schiff. If the shot at Lexington was heard around the world, the scream of Adam Schiff was heard at planets yet discovered.

As he calmed down from the brutal assault on his body his mantra was, "I am going to kill them, I don't care what they do to me, I am going to kill them. Over and over again, he repeated that statement.

As they released his legs, put the stool under his feet, released his hands, and helped him down, he turned to kill Jeff first. Unfortunately, Jeff was smart enough to be standing behind a wall of eight M-16s.

Jeff said, "Pick up your pants. They are in the third car from the front. Have a nice meal; regardless of which one you eat."

"We will meet one day Jeff, and it will be fun."

"You are correct Adam, it will be fun. I will take you apart piece by piece, because I am a trained killer. You are not. You are just angry with me now because I was following orders. Calm down, and in a few hours, you will be fine. If you still want a piece of me, I work Tuesday through Saturday from 6 AM to 4 PM. From what I understand, you will be working 18-hour days, from, 6 AM to midnight. Come in two minutes early, because I will need less than 30 seconds to have you submit, and give you at least 1 ½ minutes to recover and go to work."

"You are that good?"

"Asked the gentleman in front of me for that answer?"

"Is he that good?"

"He is our trainer, and he is better than that. It won't take him 30 seconds with you, sometimes it doesn't take him 30 seconds with us."

"Jeff, if I ever need help, I'll give you a call."

"Thank you Adam, the ladies are waiting."

"I won't hurt them, I promise."

"Excellent answer."

*************

Sandra received an email from Joseph.

"Hello: there will be a private jet waiting for you at 4 o'clock Friday afternoon at Burlington Airport. A limousine will pick you and the girls up at 2:45 PM. Be on that aircraft Sandra, or I will sue your parents and you for whatever money they have left. I know the trouble they are in, and you caused them. I couldn't be happier. Your sister is no longer a concern to anyone I have made sure that. I have found out certain things, and if they are true, I really need to talk to you, and the girls."

Sandra read the email over and over. Where did Joseph get the money to hire a limousine and a private jet? What did he know about her parents, and her accident? She had no idea what was going on, but she and the girls were going to be on that aircraft."

She emailed him back.

"Joseph, my parents have me on a very tight budget. They scrutinize everything I do, and every place I go. Would it be possible for you to get rid of them for a week or two weeks?"

"Sandy, they just won a Presidential Cruise to the Greek Isles. All expenses paid, from home to New York, and return. They will find out about it in three days."

"Joseph, am I allowed to ask where you got all this money from?"

"Don't you read the paper? I won the super lottery, almost $800 million."

"I am not lying; it could not happen to a nicer person."

"I know you're not lying. I know a lot more about you now, then I did when we were married."

"What do you mean?"

"We will talk about that when you get here."

"Joseph, you can't leave me hanging like this."

"Yes I can goodbye Sandy."

"Bastard."

"You met both my parents, so it's not possible. Be nice, or I will spank you while you're here."

"You can't do that again, we are not married anymore."