The Estate Pt. 12

She was carrying a shopping bag, a well used flimsy plastic bag, full to the brim and my guess is that her onion had escaped from it. "Can I offer you a tea or a coffee and a better shopping bag; there is a spare bag for life in the house somewhere."

"Well, that is kind of you, but I only have to go to the top of the street, so, thank you but, no thank you." At that point her shopping bag split and emptied onto my drive.

"Well, if you're sure," I said with a grin on my face.

"Ha bloody ha," She said.

"Wait here, I'll go and find a bag." I went indoors and grabbed one of the spare shopping bags we kept in the understairs cupboard.

"Right then, this is, I think, a bit bigger than your old bag, and is less likely to commit suicide within sight of home." I crouched down beside her and helped pack her shopping into the bigger bag.

"Thank you, I will return it after I have emptied it."

"Oh goodness, no worries, keep it, as I said, it's a spare. You might as well come in for that coffee now, let your shopping get acclimatised to its new surroundings."

"Thank you, okay, yes, I'm Debbie, by the way."

"Hello Debbie by the way, I'm Jase. Unusual surname you have."

"Anyone ever told you that you are an idiot?"

"All the time, and they would be totally right. Now then, tea, coffee, vodka, gin?"

"Just a coffee please."

She shut the front door behind her and I pressed grind on the coffee machine. "It's espresso, white or black?"

"Oh, nice. White please, no sugar."

"Grab a seat, make yourself comfortable, I'll bring the coffee through in a moment. Your house is probably the same as ours, so you know where the downstairs loo is if you want to use it." I called through to her. I finished making the two coffees and went through to the lounge. Debbie was sat in the armchair. I passed her a coffee and I went and sat opposite in the settee.

"Thank you Jase."

"You're welcome. How is life at the top of the estate?"

"Pretty much the same as down here I suppose. I speak to the occasional neighbour, potter in my garden, sit in the sun, if we ever get any, and that is about it. How about down here?"

"It is a bit quiet. We have a neighbour that is a busy body, she has a telescope that she looks into people's houses, so most of us are migrating to the back bedroom."

"Oh my God, that is so rude."

"I think she is just sad."

"I know, but really. I don't think we have anyone like that at our end."

"One of my neighbours is gay and seems to think that every man he meets is also gay."

"What? My God, it is mad down here."

"He might be right though."

"Shut up. I mean, that is silly, you're married and everything."

"Marriage doesn't mean anything. It could be just for outward appearances."

"No way."

"As it happens, mine is to all outward appearances."

"Are you gay?"

"I could prove to you that I am not."

"Oh very good. I see what you are doing."

I laughed and took a drink of my coffee, ensuring that she could see exactly where my eyes were focused.

"Oh, and what might that be?"

"Seeing if you can entice me."

"And could I?"

"You are married, remember?"

"Only for outward appearances, remember?"

"Are all men like you?"

"What? Honest? Probably not. I just admit to what I am, and I make no pretences otherwise."

"Well, Mr Outwards Appearances, No. But, I would like to offer you a return coffee."

"Well Miss By The Way, I am free tomorrow morning if you are."

"Indeed. Mine is the house with the potted conifers either side of the front door."

"Nine?"

"Fine."