All Comments on 'My Fall and Rise Ch. 05'

It's not particularly ... erotic (so far).

What it is, rather, is spectacularly written.

Forced to choose between the two? I pick spectacularly written, every time. I cannot wait for the next installment.

See, that's the difference between you and me. I've written a few stories. You are a *writer*, and that talent shines. Brava, ma'am. Molto brava.

This is a very well written tale. I really feel like I'm getting to know Melissa, and want to hear about her hopeful recovery and future. Thank you very much for sharing!

RNebular

I've got to agree with the other commenters who have suggested that this story would fare very well with a wider publication. I can't tell whether this story is autobiographical or not. If it is, then more power to you, because I've got to think that the first part of your title has taken its course and the second part still has a long ways to go. If the story isn't autobiographical, then it is even more a tribute to your artistry in having created such a sincere heroine and such a realistic, granny-panties-and-raman-noodle situation.

I can't remember ever reading a court scene like this one: from the point of view of a witness who is brought in in the middle of the trial, who hasn't seen the defendant since the night of the incident, who still feels the love she once felt for him even though she realizes that he has betrayed her and even thought she has steeled herself to testify against him, whose testimony is cut short because of some commotion between him and his attorney, who is taken back to prison without ever really knowing what the commotion was all about. It would be hard to imagine a more poignant metaphor for the human condition.

Anyway, I don't know what you're doing writing here, but I hope it will serve its purpose and get you on to the audience you deserve. Thanks.

Well I disagree with the comment about lack of eroticism, personally the closet really did it for me.

Ps, got to be Charlie for ass play lol

I was going to go through the whole story before commenting, but I can't do it, the story is so well done, and I thank you for it. For me, at this moment was when Sarah told Melissa about the mitigation and that she could go home. I darn near cried along with her.

You are planning on putting this in book form, right?

Thank you

Ted

What can I say that I haven't said already?

I have to agree with Hector. This is so amazingly well written, and I too can't make up my mind if it's autobiographical or just (just?) an incredibly well researched fiction. I sort of hope the latter, because at every step I find myself feeling for Melissa, but if it is fiction then it seems to me one of the most thoroughly researched works I have ever read. I just wish I had time to read the rest tonight.

... and the eroticism?

It's there, certainly, but it's secondary to the general story, and that doesn't detract from my enjoyment of it in the least. Melissa tells the tale and you seem to live it with her...

... and... I think Pooky must be made of tougher stuff than me. It really had me in tears this time :)

Absolutely brilliant :)

Thanks Melissa :)

BTW: I notice you were nominated for an award for this. The competition will have to be pretty good to beat it :)

My eyes watered at the news from Sarah. This is deeply moving.*****

I finally got around to reading this series of yours. I had been meaning to, for a while. It's not like anything else I've read at Literotica. You combine a gift as a storyteller with a deft way with words. All your characters seem so real. All the emotions seem real. But I think it's your writing style that I enjoy most. You have a very good ear for words.

I can't think of any constructive criticism to give. Sometimes I find myself wanting more -- more on the relationship between Melissa and her mother, or more dialogue in specific scenes. It's not so much a matter of criticism as that I'm drawn into the story and I'm curious to hear more. I want to know more about some of the characters that are important in Melissa's life.

I'm enjoying it so far and intend to keep reading to the finish, and I'll make another comment when I finish the last chapter.

Fantastic

Melissa ….. you definitely in one ligue playing along with famous authors, name it and i agree ….. just two pages and it’s gripping …… still in this shortness you draw me in and im hooked …… this is a gift and so special ….. ARTIstic

I honored that i can read your tales

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So much praise for your writing skills and your ability to capture the experiences of the incarcerated. Melissa, is showing kindness and compassion in a very difficult time.