Siblings with Benefits Ch. 30

"We played earlier so I could give you what you needed sis." Mark said. "You needed me so I let you think I needed you."

"What?" I asked stunned. "You did need me Mark! That's why I came over and..."

Mark silenced me by gently placing a finger to my lips and then began talking softly;

"First of all Megan I do need you always have always will. But let's be honest here sis you came over as much for yourself as you did for me didn't you?"

I started to open my mouth to answer but Mark playfully tapped my lip again and continued;

"Now I'm not saying that you didn't think I needed you but face it sis you needed me more. No actually you came here because you needed me to need you. You were afraid I was mad and you were worried about me and I appreciate it." He slid his finger from my lips and caressed my cheek lightly with the back of his hand.

"But you were worried about you too sis. Worried about having the best of both worlds that if I wanted to be your lover than I wouldn't be your brother. You came here as much for you as me sis, and that is fine it really is, know why?"

"I guess you'll tell me." I said.

"Because it proved my point Megan we both need each other. You always needed me and you felt better when you knew I needed you. When we were done we both felt better sis. Meg,; it's like I always said we're two halves of the same hole sis, and it's time we stopped dancing around and trying to be happy with others when the answer is each other."

"So you played me?" I asked.

Mark rolled his eyes.

"If I did it was me playing you thinking you were playing me sis. You came here looking for it. I could have wait until tomorrow but that brother sister thing seemed important to you so I went along." He paused and said quietly "As for that Meg, brother, friend, lover they're all just words sis." He smiled softly at me and added; "You're my everything Megan, and I think I'm yours as well but you have to decide that. You can call me Mark or little brother, it doesn't matter to me as long as the words I love you are there."

I felt myself start to choke up at how good that sounded but could we? My stomach began to flutter and I found I didn't know what to say. Why couldn't I answer him? How could Mark be so sure and I..."

"Don't worry sis," Mark said. "I'm not looking for the answer today. You said we'll talk over dinner tomorrow night and we will. But, as far as fooling around now Meg? Well the sex earlier proved one point this will prove another."

"What does that mean?" I demanded upset at how he had said that. "If I say no you won't be with me anymore? Are you going to blackmail me like I'm one of your court..."

"Oh spare me the drama Megan," Mark said laughing. "Christ, you do get caught up in poor me don't you?"

"Don't make fun of me Mark." I told him but could feel myself blushing as I knew he was right.

"Listen Megan I told you we won't go through this today but there is something you should know." He paused and reaching down to the desk picked up the picture of him with Samantha from the cruise.

"You know I'm sure in the beginning when I tried to get close to you in Chicago and then when I told you how I felt Saturday that you thought this was a Sammy rebound. That I got a taste of love and wanted it again and why not you? Well that's half right sis but it's backwards. See I did love Samantha and was surprised that she could love me. I mean me," Mark put his hands out. "The bad boy attorney, the arrogant womanizing devil worshipping pariah that takes whatever he wants no matter the cost." He smiled sadly at the picture in his hand and then putting it down reached out and took my hand before continuing.

"But as Samantha and I grew closer I realized that, like you, I had thought that I'd never been in love, except for Krissy when I was a kid but that was different, as time went on though something hit me. When I would lie there with Samantha and feel her love for me I realized that it wasn't new to me. I had felt it before, I had felt it my entire life but never knew what it was. The way I felt with Sammy Megan was the way I felt whenever we were together. Maybe not when you were having a lot of problems but since you have been sober Megan we have been so much closer, you know we have."

Mark squeezed my hand and I looked away before I got misty eyed at his words.

"So when I found that out I knew that it wouldn't be fair to Samantha or to myself or even to you to stay with her. I let her go and then after you spent some time with me and I was sure, I was ready to talk to you and Laura came into the picture. You were happy so I sat back and waited. I knew you wouldn't last sis because you weren't meant to. We're meant to be together Megan I know it in my heart and I think you do too you just need to stop letting your mind and your guilt get in the way."

"See that's the thing sis. I never thought I deserved to be happy, that I was a terrible person. Samantha taught me that I did deserve to be as happy as the next person and I want to be. I'm done with the pets and the games Megan I want the real thing now."

He stopped, probably because this was the most he had said in any conversation in years, and when he did I asked;

"But what's this got to do with you not wanting to..."

"Megan I said how I feel and the ball is in your court. You know what I hope you'll decide but," he sighed. "If you don't then I'm prepared to move on and look elsewhere."

"But what about us and ..."

"Megan just listen okay? Please." Mark paused and after taking a deep breath went on. "I broke it off with Sammy to pursue my true love. The same true love you keep chasing. I know who mine is and maybe I'm yours maybe I'm not. Thing is I laid it out there sis and if you say no then I tried and can put it behind me and look for someone that I can be happy with."

I started to open my mouth but he had his hand up again.

"Now what does that mean for us sis? Well in the beginning nothing. When I leave for California I'll stop and visit in Chicago for a few days and when I get set up out there you can come out and we'll have a blast. It will be just like it has been Megan we'll be siblings with benefits. But this time it won't be forever sis and this time you'll know how I feel."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Let's face it sis the last few years I've been your stand by, your fall back. We see each other we play we have fun you go back home. Then I get the call; Mark I found someone and I'm so happy." He shrugged. "Then I'm on the back burner wondering if I'll ever be with you again. Then of course it doesn't work out and little brother picks up the pieces again, just like you did for me with Samantha."

"But this time I'll be looking as well sis. I'll be looking for 'the one' as you say it. You know sis I have a lot to offer and it's not just my looks and my career. I do have a heart and I want to give it to someone I want to give it to you but if you don't want it then I'm sure someone will. They won't be you but I'll know I can never have you. Thing is Meg we'll keep going the way we have been but then one day you'll get that call sis. I'll meet someone and you'll be playing the waiting game." He shook his head.

"We been playing this game since that night I took you out to celebrate my new place. That was sixteen years ago Megan I'm tired of wondering and tired of playing games. So just be prepared for that phone call Megan and don't assume that I'm going to always be around to be your playmate."

Mark stopped and I stood there once again with no idea of what to say. The idea of never being with Mark again had occurred to me when I was with Laura but at that point I had Laura. The thought of Mark finding someone and me still being alone was not a good one. Mark had let go of my hand and was silent himself finally he looked at me and said.

"You know Megan I'm a well read, well educated professional, one of the best attorneys in the country and I'm sure if I thought about it long enough I could come up with a more profound way of saying this but in the end it comes down to one thing sis."

"What's that Mark?" I asked numbly.

Mark looked at me seriously for a moment then a slight smirk played across his face.

"Well simply put sis, if you want to keep drinking the milk it's time to buy the damn cow."

Well this ends what I would say would be part three of SWB. At this point I believe it is safe to say 10/11 more chapters until the end and that includes a kick ass epilogue that I am dying to get out there. Now normally I love feedback but do not usually request it. However I would like your opinions on a couple of matters. I think at this point the sex and even the incest may not be why you are reading but for the story. The "how it began" had no incest but did well. My Poll so to speak is I have a chapter coming up with erotica but not between M/M and also one that really no erotica fits into. I would like you takes on those concepts as I can always add something but don't feel those chapters will work as well. So question is does anyone mind at this point? Look forward to hearing from you and thank you for your support.